Low-Stakes Home Improvement

Spring is upon us (sort of), and that’s the time of year when I look around my house to see if anything needs improving. Sure, I could always paint a room, but that’s tedious and unfulfilling. No, for me it’s all about tackling low-stakes home improvement projects that require planning, a degree of ingenuity, power tools, and significant time. Little in life gives me more pleasure. A project that’s low-stakes is key. I’ve done some high-stakes projects as well, and those lead to stress, second-guessing, and safety concerns, but low-stakes projects are like a walk through the park on a mild day. Last summer I built shelving for my kitchen pantry, and that was perfect. There was no chance of my losing a digit and there was no significant risk, save for a shelf of canned goods collapsing.

This particular project probably only took me a day to execute, but it was the planning that took a week or more. I thought about it from every angle, measured and remeasured, watched videos on something called a pocket jig (who knew?), purchased said jig at Menard’s and perused shelving possibilities (Natural wood? Primed? Coated? Size?), read up on how best to anchor the sideboard into a wall that lacked properly-aligned studs...in short, I overplanned, but by the time it came to execution, well, I was ready.

And for me, planning is absolutely necessary, because I have no natural ability and have had no schooling of any kind except The Home Depot Home Improvement 1-2-3 book that my brother-in-law purchased for me back in 1997 when my wife and I moved into our first home. This was a game-changer. After all, I had never heard the words “home” and “improvement” in the same sentence in my childhood home. Sure, my mother could strip furniture and throw on coats of stain and varnish, but the only time I recall my father trying to fix something, it resulted in blood and lots of swear words, so I knew to stay clear of tools and manual projects.

When I purchased a house, I noticed all sorts of things that needed fixing, but I knew nothing. I mean, NOTHING. How do you swap out an electric outlet? No clue. How do you strip wallpaper? No clue. How do you take out a carpet and tack strips? No clue. My wife had married a man who was about as handy as screen door on a submarine.

But I was curious, I was motivated, and I wasn’t afraid to ask questions and try things. Back in these days before YouTube, it was my friend Rick who saved the day, sending me long, detailed emails that walked me through various tasks.  What he sometimes failed to realize was that I didn’t even know how to use a tool properly. I recall the first time I made a cut with a circular saw as part of a project to build my own music rackmount box: my hands were shaking, I was so terrified, sure that I was about to lose a finger or an eye. Today, I have to remind myself to wear eye protection when making a cut. I’ve come a long way.

Since then I’ve tackled all sorts of projects, including some that make me shudder today, as in “That was kind of crazy – I’m not going to do THAT again.” I’m no longer willing to do those. But projects like adding stairway railings or building record racks or installing pantry shelves? You betcha.

Say it with me: low stakes.

So I’m going to spend the next several months ascertaining which project to accomplish, a few more months planning said project, and by the fall I might be ready to put the plan into action!

A to Z Music Challenge

On the podcast 1000 Greatest Misses, co-host Chris and I submitted the following music challenge to our listeners: you’re sent to a desert island and are allowed to take with you the recordings of only 26 artists - one for each letter of the alphabet. Who do you choose? This challenge comes courtesy of my daughter and her partner who needed to kill some time while driving through Indiana last Thanksgiving. And what a great time suck it was!

Chris and I were delighted by the number of responses we received from listeners, further proving the point that although people aren’t always willing to tackle the pressing issues of our times, they will happily piss away a few hours on a completely frivolous endeavor! We thought it would be helpful to include everyone’s picks in one place so that they might inspire further investigation. There are tons of choices of artists I’ve never even heard of, much less listened to, and I hope to check some of them out in the days ahead.

For me, I stuck to rock and pop and didn’t go down the jazz or classical rabbit holes. Some letters - B, C, J, P, S - were exceptionally difficult, while others - G, N, O, Q, U, Y - were absolute no-brainers.

Consider coming up with your own choices before perusing the lists below. Please ignore misspelling, and please don’t shoot the messenger when it comes to entries that should have been disqualified (Elvis Costello as an E entry, for example); Chris and I didn’t catch some of these as they came pouring in toward the end of our podcast challenge. Also, consider checking out author S.W. Lauden’s Substack where he addresses the same music challenge. And yes, I am aware than Ken was messing with us when he chose acts like USA for Africa and Pia Zadora. All good!

Five Power Pop Gems

One of the benefits of co-hosting the podcast 1000 Greatest Misses has been getting introduced to music lovers whose knowledge far surpasses my own. It can be humbling, to be sure, but also exciting, because I get to broaden my understanding of music and some of the people who’ve made an impact on the industry. Last June, my podcast partner Chris and I were privileged to interview S.W. .Lauden, not only a killer musician and uber music fan, but also an accomplished author whose Substack Remember the Lightning explores power pop and indie rock in fun, creative and informative ways.

On his Substack, Lauden has an on-going series called ‘Is It Power Pop?!” in which special guests recommend five great power pop tracks that music fans should be aware of. I had the pleasure of submitting this week’s entry, and I have to say, writing about music is much harder than playing music, but I did my best and chose five killer tracks. You can check out my entire essay on Lauden’s site, but below are my choices. Some might teeter on the edges of power pop, but they’re all great songs:

“Money’s No Good” by Off Broadway
”Here Comes Sally” by Glen Burtnick
”She’s So Young” by The Pursuit of Happiness
”Our Story” by The Judy Bats
”Caught in the Middle” by The Red Button

Be sure to click subscribe on Lauden’s Substack, and also check out his music-related books, both fiction and non-fiction. The guy’s a gem! You can hear our interview with Lauden on episode 111 of 1000 Greatest Misses.

Life Without Amazon

Comedian Marc Maron has a bit on his latest HBO special where he laments how little we as consumers can do to limit the power of big companies like Amazon. In it, he imagines Jeff Bezos cruising on his $100 million yacht, tracking the number of subscribers to Amazon Prime, and saying, “Looks like we lost one.”

It can often feel as if we’re powerless, but as with so many things in life – being kind, giving to charity, supporting local political movements, disposing our toxic waste properly – it’s important to live according to one’s values. It boosts our sense of self, it provides a model for our children, and it potentially moves the needle of society in some small way.

My wife and I had been saying for over a year that we should really ditch our subscription to Amazon Prime, not because it isn’t a good deal – it is – but because we don’t really want to support powerful companies anymore if they can be avoided. After all, I cancelled my Spotify subscription last year without regret, and I wondered if life without Amazon would be equally unproblematic. There are a lot of online articles you can research about how to shop without Amazon, but I decided I wasn’t going to bother – just go in and get ‘er done.

So we pulled the plug to our Prime membership a few months ago, and you know what? So far it hasn’t been a big deal at all. I’ve had to search a little harder for some items, but I ultimately found what I needed, and sometimes at lower costs than I would have paid on Amazon.  Here are a few examples:

Audio cables: I tried Best Buy, Crutchfield and Audio Advisor, but none offered what I was looking for. But then a search led me to Sweetwater, where I’ve often purchased recording equipment. Turns out they provide some home audio accessories for the same cost as Amazon, with free shipping and quick delivery. Perfect.

Soap dispensers: we were unhappy with the ones we purchased at Target a few years back and wanted something that would last a while. We opted to go to a local retail store called Uncharted, which now has around ten stores nationwide. It’s a fun place to browse – exactly the kind of brick-and-mortar store we want to support.

Two healthcare items to help with my arthritis: this was trickier. Ultimately, I saved about $20 by not purchasing them on Amazon and instead ordering from Walmart. Now, Walmart is not exactly a local mom and pop store, but it’s still less than half the size of Amazon. Not a perfect solution, but it got the job done in a pinch. This example shows the limitations of trying to avoid behemoths.

Books: there’s been a lot of buzz about the resurgence of Barnes and Noble, which has reimagined its business philosophy and is adding dozens of physical stores. It’s funny how what was once considered the “Big, Bad Bookstore” is now considered an underdog. Still, I haven’t had a great deal of success finding what I want at Barnes and Nobel. Instead, I’ve went the used route, purchasing second-hand books through eBay, often from charitable organizations. There’s also a great local used bookstore a few miles from my house that I try from time to time. They don’t always have what I’m looking for, but sometimes they come through.

My experiment of life without Amazon has only gone on for a few months so far, but I already think it will last. If needed, I can imagine paying one month of Prime during the holiday season when we’re making a lot of purchases and sending them out of state, but I’m hoping we can even avoid this compromise. Give it a shot! We lived without Amazon before the late 90s, and we can do it again. Maybe when Bezos sees tens of thousands of people unsubscribing from Prime, he’ll start to pay attention.

Sitting, Standing and Aging

It’s come to this:

If I stand too long, I need to sit.

If I sit too long, I need to stand.

This is not the way it used to be. I remember grooving with a gang of friends at a Jimmy Buffet concert back in 1990 and getting barked at by the old fogies behind us who wanted us to sit down. Now I’m one of those old fogies, except that I because I remember youth, I never tell someone to sit down. I just deal with it and wish I was forty years younger.

Last October I attended a Major League Baseball playoff game with an expensive seat that I paid for, and from the opening notes of “The Star Bangled Banner” to the last toss to first base, the crowd stood. Similarly, when I went to a Keane concert at the Chicago Theater in 2024 with an expensive seat that I paid for, from the opening chord to the last note of the encore, the crowd stood. I said not a word at either event, but I sure had to pick my spots to take a little breather and remind my body that it just had to hang in there for a little while longer.

Why? Why do we feel compelled to stand when we can just as easily see the action with our butts on the seats we paid for? There must be something about the act of standing that feels more engaged, more intentional, but man, do I wish it wasn’t so.

At least with a paid seat you can rest from time to time, but after attending an standing-room-only concert in Chicago last fall, I think I’ve sworn off these venues for good. I spent much of the night shifting from side to side and taking stretch breaks and walks to loosen my limbs. I just can’t do it anymore.

“Maybe it’s just standing in place that’s a problem. What if you’re moving around?”

Yeah, well, that can be an issue, too. When I work at the record store, I’m fairly mobile, restocking shelves, retrieving inventory, alphabetizing and helping customers. But after just two or three hours, my back feels like it’s a corkscrew.

“Well then, sitting must surely be okay.”

Oh, if only! I played piano on Christmas Eve at a church service, and I was reminded that extended sessions at a piano bench are no better than standing. After every carol ended in a “Halleluiah” or “Fa La La,” I took an opportunity to stand and stretch.

“So you can’t stand, you can’t walk around and you can’t sit. What can you do?”

Um…honestly, complain. That’s about all I have left.